While formal invitations, complete with calligraphy and foil-lined envelopes are never out of style, the breadth of invite design options has grown immensely. The use of watercolor and illustrated elements is also growing to such an extent that many stationery companies now have a resident artist to accommodate those personalized, handmade touches. Beyond formal calligraphy, you might choose whimsical hand-lettering or even white ink on dark envelopes. Dress up your invites with a belt or sash wrapped around the middle. Hand-drawn embellishments, a chalkboard look, and vintage-inspired designs are also lovely if they work with the style of your wedding.

Wedding invitation suites typically consist of several parts: a ceremony card with the details of the ceremony (traditionally with a layer of tissue paper on top), a reception card explaining reception details, a response card with its stamped/addressed envelope (yes, it’s proper etiquette to provide return postage), a map or some other card with directions to the ceremony/reception and hotel information for out-of-town guests, and an inner and outer envelope. The rules aren’t hard and fast, however, you can combine information on a single card, omit the tissue paper, or really think outside the box with your design if that suits the style of your wedding day. For example, your response card might be a simple postcard.

When it comes time to assemble the pieces, here’s the traditional way. Start with the ceremony invitation on the bottom (covered with tissue, if using), followed by the reception card, and the response card with the unsealed return envelope and map. Slide these items into the inner envelope, but do not seal it. Slide the inner envelope into the outer envelope with the addressee’s name facing the back flap (this way their name will be the first thing they see upon opening the invitation).

Traditionally, whoever is hosting (read: paying for) the wedding will be listed first on the invitation. But it’s best to work this out on a case-by-case basis with open communication between the couple, the bride’s parents, and the groom’s parents. Some couples today who are paying for the majority of their wedding with help from mixed and blended families simply say, “Mary Bride and John Groom, together with their families, request the honor of your presence at their marriage.” An experienced professional will be able to assist you more with wording, and online research is also a great way to get the wheels turning.

To address the envelopes, you can run them through your printer in a beautiful font, hand-write them yourself, or hire a hand-letterer to do the job for you. Hand lettering gives a beautiful first impression and can even act as a sort of frameable gift to your guests. Avoid using labels at all costs, even clear ones as they just don’t convey an elegance or special-ness that a wedding deserves.

If you want to keep things formal/classic, here are some tips for the etiquette of addresses. Street names, cities, and states should be written out completely (no abbreviations). To address a married couple, use “Mr. and Mrs. Tom Smith.” For an unmarried couple living together, use “Mr. Tom Smith and Miss Judy Jones.” If every member of the family is invited, use “Mr. and Mrs. Tom Smith & Family.” If only older children are invited, write their names under the parents’ names, such as, “Miss Jane Smith.” Adult children no longer living with their parents should receive their own invitation. If you don’t want young children at your reception, politely say “adults only” somewhere in the invite and confirm this fact when you talk to your guests before the wedding.

Include your return address on the back of the envelope. Placing it on the back is less crowded and leaves room for the guest’s address to shine on the front. You can handwrite your return address, or in this case, printed labels are an acceptable shortcut. You’ll also want to make sure that the return address matches the primary host. If Mary Bride and John Groom are hosting (paying for) the bulk of the wedding, you’ll see their return address on the back. If Mary’s parents are hosting, you’ll see her parents’ names/address on the back.

One last critical tip: Before you send all your invites, take one to the post office. Have it weighed to confirm the postage cost in case it weighs more than the normal envelope or is an odd shape. The last thing you want is for all your invitations to be returned as “insufficient postage!” so stop at the post office, make absolutely sure all is right with your stamps, pop those gorgeous invitations in the mail, and take a deep breath. Your wedding is officially underway!