Wedding Notes – Attendants

Wedding Notes – Attendants

 How many bridesmaids should I have?

According to various bridal experts, the traditional formula is one bridesmaid for every 50 guests.  And while that rule seems to make sense for groomsmen and ushers, the formula is somewhat looser for bridesmaids.  If you have a large family of sisters or close friends, you should include them all if that works for you.  If you only have a few close relatives or friends, a smaller bridal party is fine.  Sometimes there is a potential conflict if either the bride or the groom wants a bigger wedding party than the other one might. Some negotiation will be necessary.  Our consultants can suggest other wedding related roles that you can offer to these “extras”.  While it is usual to have one maid or matron of honor, there is nothing wrong with having one of each or two maids of honor if you have close friends or relatives that you want in that role.

How can I include my out of town bridesmaid?

If she lives some distance away and you really want her to plan to attend a shower or other event related to the wedding, you owe it to her to tell her that up front when you ask her to be in the wedding.  Travel can be an additional burden on this friend – especially if you can’t afford to cover her travel expenses.  If she accepts then you need to make every effort to keep her in the loop of the wedding related activities and news.  Establishing and maintaining an email link is vital to communicating news.  Make sure that she knows about the website you’ve established and can access it easily.

How do I handle a bridesmaid who hasn’t gotten measured or ordered her dress yet?

Give her a gentle reminder that the order is being held up waiting for her size and deposit.  Offer to meet her at the bridal shop at a certain date and time at her convenience.  Make it a lunch date or a dinner date to order the dress and then have time together.  If the maid is a relative on the groom’s side, enlist in the help of the groom’s mother and ask her to remind the maid that “time is critical”.  Your made of honor can assume the role of captain of the maids and call this maid as many times as is necessary to get this done. We recommend 6 months lead time to get dresses ordered.